Tony-isms

That’s Tony on the left.
Jason dressed up as him for
Halloween.

My Kentucy friend, Tony, has a splendid way of presenting similies at some pretty unique moments.  I decided to take note and post them here.  I should add that I’m going to take the editorial liberty of making this G-rated.  His words are a bit more….direct.  Oh yeah, and imagine the heavy Kentucky drawl as you read them.

For starters:

“He’s as messed up as a soup sandwich.”

“He’s so stupid he wouldn’t have sense to pour piss out of a boot if the directions were written on the bottom.”

When told he would have to wait becasue of someone else:
“Well, I’m just suckin’ on the back teat, ain’t I?”
(Apparently, the runt always gets the leftover back teat on the sow.  Had to have this one explained to me.)

“Love like a star-fillled night with a meteor shower coming down…”

“I’ll be outta here so fast people will be looking at the reflection of where I used to be.”